If you’re spinning your wheels and getting no where in your weight loss, worse yet, engaging in self-sabotage, it’s likely due to conflicting beliefs you hold as true. Listen in as I explain both the formula for permanence and how a belief in your own enoughness can change the game.
In this video:
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There’s a really sticky situation that you could potentially be in that may be completely sabotaging your weight loss and you don’t even know it. My name is Maya. I’m a behavioral registered dietician, founder at Healthy Habit Solutions, and creator of the curriculum. It’s a habit and behavior change curriculum of online foundational life courses to help you achieve permanent health, and permanent weight loss, and unconditional peace and happiness not through another diet but through actual habit and behavior change. Now, this conflicting belief system that I’m talking about, I kind of have to give you a big picture overview, which I’ll do here momentarily. When you believe to be true in your world that … and you hold it as a belief system that says, “If I don’t lose the weight, then, of course, I’m going to be unhappy. If I do lose the weight, I will still be unhappy in my relationship, in my job, in my life, et cetera. I’ll still be lonely. I still won’t be where I want to be.” So, because of those repeated thought systems, which are simply belief systems or repeated thoughts, we get in our own way. We sabotage our own efforts because what’s the point in reaching for a shake or a salad if either way the scale goes it’s a lose-lose forming.
Let me give you the big picture formula here so we can step back and I can offer a new strategy or suggestion, plant a new seed in your mind that may sprout and take root so you can see this in a new light. The whole formula that we work with here at Healthy Habit Solutions that I’ve developed in the curriculum is there’s four foundational life courses. You have to know this formula in order to be able to move forward from this belief, because it’s one of the deeper systems that we work with.
Clients come to me and they say, “Maya, I want to lose weight. I’m eating too many cookies and I’d like to eat less cookies.” In the very beginning, we have to learn how to use willpower strategically. That’s How to Change a Habit Foundational Life Course. Once I learn how to use willpower strategically instead of changing 998 things about my life on Monday and falling into chocolate cake by Friday, then I learn to use stepping stone routines. I learn to take the path of least resistance.
Now, physical habits and behaviors, if I’m eating less cookies then that’s only going to last as long as I fall into the old emotional habit. The emotions drive our physical behaviors or physical habits. Why do I eat cookies? Because I’m stressed out. If I’m eating less cookies and I fall into the stress, then I get on the hamster wheel and go back to the cookies, eat less cookies, then go back to stress and round and round I go. In this work, emotional habits tend to be stress, anxiety, overwhelm, frustration, depression. Those are very common types of emotional habits that we experience, and those emotions drive our behaviors.
One step back is our thought habits or our mental habits. In this work, in this curriculum, with the addiction based mindset, which is where I came from, we fall under the 50 thousand to 70 thousand thoughts that our mind has in any one given day … falls into patterns of thought such as all or nothing thinking, black and white thinking, perfectionism, pizza and cake, carrots and celery, on a diet, off a diet, always waiting for the next shoe to drop, fear of failure, extremist behaviors and mentalities. Those thought systems or ways of thought drive our emotions which drive our behaviors. In the case of potential stress and cookie eating, it could be something as simple as somebody didn’t pick up my phone call, my meeting got changed. I don’t know how I’m going to get all of this work done. There’s some control freak thought habits in there, perfectionist thought habits in there, which are driving the stress which is driving the behavior.
Now, one of the deepest levels in this work is a belief system. A belief system is simply a repeated thought, a thought that you have thought over and over and over again. That is a belief that drives our thoughts, our emotions, and our behaviors. What you believe to be true about your world drives what you think, what you feel, and what you do. If you hold a belief system that says there’s no point if I lose the weight because my life is still going to suck. I’m still going to be unhappy in my job, relationship, et cetera. I’m still going to be lonely. Or if I don’t lose the weight then I’m going to be mad at myself and then be even worse off. That belief system is driving your thoughts, your emotions, and your actions. Hence, the actions of not aligning my actions with weight loss of course, right? You can see this whole train in the curriculum, by the way, is four foundational life courses that teaches you how do I change a physical habit, emotional habit, thought habit, and deeper belief system, which you’ll find out what happens beyond belief because there’s something very important there as well.
The little golden nugget, the little seed that I’d like to plant in your brain today simply says this, that the conflicting belief system that you hold to be true in your mind, the repeated thought, is causing massive resistance. In this work you’ll learn about resistance in all areas. We resist things on a really really big level. The more resistance we have, the more that we sabotage our own wants and desires. The more that we can work to reduce our resistance, the more we can allow that which we want in our life to come in easily and effortlessly. In each of the foundational life courses, in each area, you learn how to reduce your resistance in physical behaviors, in emotional habits and thought-based habits, and in deeper belief systems.
Now, after doing this work in habit and behavior change for eleven plus years, there’s one thing that I know to be true. There’s a belief system, or a repeated thought, that simply says, “I don’t believe I’m good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, perfect enough, beautiful enough. My whole life I’ve never been good enough for myself.” This has nothing to do with your weight loss. It has nothing to do with the cookies, and it has everything to do with a cultivation of your belief in your own enoughness. You see that plastered everywhere. It’s what I talk about all the time. And our enoughness is based upon truth. That’s what’s beyond belief, and you learn that in the curriculum which I won’t go into now. But instead of focusing on weight loss maybe for this year, but instead of focusing on weight loss, instead of focusing and allowing resistance in thought via a split thinking mind, then you can introduce the new thought. How can I see this differently? How can I feel better about this? Thought redirection that simply says, “Instead of focusing on my weight loss, I’m going to focus on my enoughness. I’m going to align my thoughts, my behaviors and my emotions with the fact that right now in this moment, if nothing were to change in my life, I am enough. I am good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, perfect enough. I am enough.”
When we can work to align our thoughts, emotions and behaviors with enoughness, we start seeing very different results. Because the moment that you introduce time, “When am I going to lose this weight? If I lose this weight, then in the future this will never change,” we invite in stress and anxiety with thoughts of the future. With thoughts of the past, there’s emotions of depression because we only feel what we feel because of what we think.
I’ve given you lots of nuggets today. The take home nugget, the take home seed I’d like to plant in your brain is this, is enoughness. With a belief system, a repeated thought, aligned action in your own enoughness, that will change the game and slowly start to eliminate, fade away, the conflicting beliefs that you hold to be true in your mind.
As always, move forward with us. Get your butt inside the curriculum. Start learning how to do these things. I have a finance option. Alternatively, students in the curriculum, too, I’ve started one day intensives this year. The first one is in Phoenix, Arizona in a couple weeks. I’ll put the link to both the curriculum, the habit and behavior change curriculum, and the intensives. Feel free to join us. I’d love to have you in any of those areas so you can continue your journey and start cultivating a belief in your own enoughness.